Saturday, July 18, 2009
Current mood: used
The appreciation of a good friend goes a long way. I am not complaining about the friends I have. In fact, I'm referencing them as "Bad Asses" RIGHT NOW lol. Being single has its perks but is there ever a time that we really heal completely from the past? I don't know about you but my skin reveals all wounds and often I scar. Never have I regretted anything I have done because I believe the path I've taken has lead me to understand the good in people, the bad in people and my ability to swing from both ends of the pendelum as well. I think that my understanding of my life lays still in front of me and I'm not afraid to bend down and caress it and remind myself of my own dedication to my own decisions. I have decided that for once in my life...being single is what I WANT. I have tried to convince myself of this before but failed miserably. HA I'm not afraid to admit it. In every relationship or relationSHIT you have to understand that there are ups and downs. I read something the other day that said, "Everyone is going to hurt you at some point in some way, you just have to decide who is worth the pain." I believe this. Some incidences are obvious that you would NOT recover from, but others...I believe it depends on how much you care for the person. I'm not saying the decision is right but it could be right for you. Only you can decide what path your life will take and you gotta take what other people think and brush it off just as quickly as it is thrown at you. Drama is not my style.
I like the confidence of knowing that there is someone out there that would choose to spend their time with me over anyone else. But why must that be true? I have friends that would prefer for me to be around and invite me to almost everything they do and yet I have a choice of whether or not to go. That ability to choose my own fate is absolutely blissful. I have my best friends and they know who they are. These people are the ones that would do almost anything for me as long as it is humanly possible for them to. These friends are amazing and I am truly blessed to have them in my heart. Some I see every day. Some I haven't seen in years. Reguardless, they know that they are important to me and I love them to the ends of the earth I know that lately I've had the choice of being a part of friendship that comes without chains. WHAT? You mean to tell me that I could have had someone around that enjoys my company as much as mine but then doesn't care if I feel like dancing with someone else? WHAT? Why was I unaware of this before? Seriously I need to sue the people that made me believe relationships have to come with emotions such as jealousy! I'm offended by this misunderstanding! WOW! I've been missing out on this stressless fun thing! aha! Got it now. and THANK GOD FOR THAT! WAIT Am I being used? Or is it the other way around? Wait! Does it matter? It is OK. NICE AH! no...okay I'm done not really okay yeah now. he hee
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