Here I go and there you'll stay

Monday, July 13, 2009

Current mood: bullied

So I sit here thinking about all of the things that happen in a day. What will I choose to do today? I think I'll sleep off my bad thoughts first. No need to act on them. If I were to, then I would be no better than the ones who harrass me for no reason other than boredom. There are more than one unfortunately, what they don't understand is that I may not be used to them giving me hell but it's not my first rodeo. I got hit with this same stuff a while back ago and it still hasn't stopped completely. Boredom can really test you and I'm guessing that some people just need something to do with their days. Other than obsessing over ex-boyfriends or girlfriends. Which is why this will be my last blog mentioning my ex in any way other than dead to me. He and "his family" can have this one. They are happy. What they don't understand is that they've already won. No need to rub in that everyone is okay over there. I'm happy for them :). And as far as my past with him goes, I will never mention anything about children, my nephew or neices in reference to him. As far as my family is concerned, we have decided that my family will no longer have anything to do with any of this. I have blocked this user and I will block out the 7 years that my life was miserable due to this kind of childish games. I was the bigger person and asked for everyone to leave me alone but that doesn't work. Do not mention this person around me. As far as I'm concerned...they do not exist.



OH one more thing, you did this to yourself. Because the last couple of weeks have been absolutely awesome for me. I was blindsided by all of this but whatever makes a person feel worth it to him or herself. I will take the flack for it. I'm done being your pin cushion. You can continue to use yourself for that and I wish you the best in all you do. Good luck. All I can say is when it was necessary, I gave you everything I had. You took the rest. FORTUNATELY, I have found people even in the last few weeks that replenish some of what you could never give back to me...or that I would never accept from you again. :) Good LUCK!

AND LITTLE BROTHER, this does exclude you, you can make your own decisions and I love you like the brother you've always been to me. Don't think that I am referencing you in any way, You know I'm here for you in any way you may need me. I love you endlessly.